Posts Tagged ‘wordpress’

It’s a new Month, so that means I’ve hardly had any fun yet.

On Sunday, I headed Downtown to meet my Wife, and did a little shopping.
I didn’t buy anything fun. Just stuff I needed around the House.
After that, we returned home & I did Laundry.

On Monday, we headed to Walmart to buy more stuff we needed.

Today, my Morning was spent training a new Personal Care Attendant. This Afternoon has been spent making Phone calls and I went to the Bank.

My Wheelchair started crapping out last night in Walmart.
It’s annoying because I just got it fixed, but now, the right button’s acting up.
Hopefully, I’ll get a hold of my Repair guy soon.
My new Chair can’t come soon enough.

My Wife & I will be watching America’s Got Talent tonight.
Unlke last year, I will NOT be recapping the shows.
I realize I got TONS of hits because of it, but this is my Blog, and I’m going to focus on writing about my life.
There’s plenty of other sites that will recap it.

Here’s an interesting tidbit:
In a few Weeks, a friend & I will be teaching a Workshop on Comedy.
I’m really looking forward to it because we’ve never worked together before, but he’s a good friend of mine.
I also like the thought of teaching others.
Teacher + Power = Rawr!

What kind of screwed up World are we living in where I can be considered a Teacher, especially in Comedy?
I feel bad for the Students,

Stay in School, kids!

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I had a blast in Montreal.
I’ll write all about it on Monday.

This is my 200th post.

Nah, not really…

So my Wife’s Niece left just after 7 last night with her Grandpa.
My Wife’s place suddenly felt quiet for awhile. We hung out for awhile without the TV on even, which was nice.

We came back to my place and emailed some pictures to her Relatives, and then she left.

As for myself, I twittered chatted with some people, which was fun.
Most of the people on my Twitter list are complete strangers. Either, we met through a certain topic and they like what I said or through something called Follow Friday. Basically, you whore yourself on Fridays to get more followers.

My Wife tends to get suspicious with me talking to Strangers online. She doesn’t think that I’m gonna cheat or anything. She’s just worried that I’ll share too much personal information and someone will use it against me or something like that.

While that’s a legitimate concern, I’m pretty careful when it comes to posting pictures online. I only put personal pictures on Facebook, where I know everyone personally in some way.

I mainly use Twitter to (corrupt) meet new people and show them that I’m just a regular guy who happens to be Physically Disabled.
That’s also the main reason why I blog.

Update on the Montreal Trip:
As alot of you know, my trip to Montreal today was cancelled due to a Staff shortage of my Personal Care Attendants. I’m happy to report my Wife managed to exchange the Tickets for next Sunday instead. Keep your fingers crossed for us cause it’s been a rough year for both of us, so we deserve this.

It’ll also be our Third Anniversary of our Engagement. As most of you know, we can’t get married or live together. If we did, I’d lose my funding.
Wednesday is the actual day of the Anniversary. I’ll share the story of how I proposed on Wednesday.

My Wife and I are going to a Movie soon.
We’re gonna see The Time Traveler’s Wife.
I’ll be back tomorrow with a review.

Thanks for reading.

Q & A — Part Two

Posted: August 11, 2009 in canada, comedy, Daily Life, Daily Living, disability, ontario, ottawa, personal, Uncategorized, writing
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Last night, I did Laundry and helped my Wife with Grocery Shopping. I like to push the Cart around & then I carry her bags home. Yes, even disabled people can help able bodied people. I put the handy in Handicapped. Alot of people look at me and seem amused that I can push a Cart with my feet & legs.
I’ve got mad skills.

Tonight, we’re gonna watch America’s Got Talent.

After I did my post yesterday, I thought of more questions for the Q & A, so here’s some more.

What’s your favorite food?

BS Answer: I eat power pellets like Pacman.

Truth: I have a hard time chewing food, so I usually drink Ensure & Isosource. Basically, they’re meals in a can, or as I call it, shit in a can. When I was younger, I used to eat pureed Hospital food. If you’ve ever seen or had Pureed Green Peas, you know why I choose to eat from a can now.

Occasionally, I enjoy eating soft foods like Ice Cream, Yogurt, Popsicles, Gelato, Chocolate anything, Creme Brulee, Cake, Pancakes, etc etc etc

What TV shows do you watch?

BS Answer: Informercials! Lots & lots of Infomercials!

Truth: I’m a big fan of Family Guy, The Simpsons, & South Park. I also watch CSI, CSI: New York, Law & Order: SVU, Criminal Minds, Big Bang Theory, Two & A Half Men, How I Met Your Mother, The Daily Show, The Colbert Report, The Tonight Show With Conan O’Brien, Jimmy Kimmel Live, Late Night With Jimmy Fallon, WWE Monday Night Raw, WWE Friday Night Smackdown, & many others.

What Music do you listen to?

BS Answer: I LOVE Elevator Music & sometimes I dance to the beats of people farting.

Truth: I like different types of Music. It depends on my mood. Mostly, I’m a Rock guy, but sometimes I listen to Blues or Jazz. One of my guilty pleasures is watching Music Videos from the 80s on my TV. It’s cheesy as hell, but HILARIOUS, and brings back memories.

What kind of Movies do you like?

BS Answer: Porn! I’m a huge Perv for Porn. I’m Pervy for Porn, baby!

Truth: I’m a big fan of Comedies. I have so many favorite Movies that it’s not even funny.

Do you drink and/or do drugs?

BS Answer: Well I snort two lines of Metamucil every day. That’s why I’m such a happy person now.

Truth: While I enjoy the odd Beer or Wine, my drinking days are behind me. As for Drugs, yeah I’ve done Drugs in the past, but that’s behind me too. Basically, I managed to quit both cold turkey, which was really tough to do.

When’s your Birthday?

BS Answer: I don’t really have one because I was made in a Factory.

Truth: January 4th.

What’s your opinion of the Internet & Social Networking?

BS Answer: If I can get free Porn, bring it on!

Truth: I LOVE the Internet & Social Networking. It gives disabled people a bigger & better chance to be seen & heard. I don’t always understand how certain sites or things work, but I have a big online pressence, and I plan on expanding that, as much as I can.

What’s the story, morning glory?

BS Answer: A stupid name for a CD.

Truth: How the hell would I know? Ask Oasis & let me know what Noel said after he punches you.

What’s your goal in life?

BS Answer: I want to solve World Hunger.

Truth: This is gonna sound selfish, but I want to be famous Worldwide. I don’t care if it’s a Movie, a Talk Show, a TV show cameo, or a Commercial, I want to be famous. I was actually in a Movie/Interactive DVD Video Game a few years ago, which was pretty fun. The “set” was right near where I live. I played a bad guy, which was the main reason why I signed up for it. Sadly, I don’t think it ever got released.

Besides that, I’d love to live in a Wheelchair Accessible House with my Wife. It’d probably be a two bedroom. Of course, the Basement would be like Pee-Wee’s Playhouse, or close to it.

What’s the meaning of life?

BS Answer: Well, Life is a Cereal apparently, so it’s tasty.

Truth: Life’s too short to even consider that. Life is what YOU want it to be. Have fun, gamble, drink, do drugs, work, sleep, be rich, be poor. Whatever your life consists of, enjoy it, and have fun. It’s a big plus if you can make a difference in a someone’s life, but you don’t HAVE to. As long as you’re enjoying it, nobody gets hurts, & you’re not doing too many illegal things, that’s what life should mean.

That’s it for now, I’m all tapped out.
I’ll be back tomorrow with a recap of America’s Got Talent.

Thanks for reading.

It’s been a few months since my last post on here.

Last time I was here, I was dealing with tough health issues and even ended up staying in the Hospital for a week. It was really tough being there, mostly because I wasn’t used to it. The last time that I was a Patient was in 1995 and that was for 3 days. Needless to say, my week stay was hard on me and of course for my Wife as well.

I’m happy to report that I’m pretty much 100% again and I’m done taking Rat Poison Pills for the Blood Clot that I had. That also means no more weekly blood tests.

Speaking of health issues…

During the whole ordeal, I did two swallow tests and they determined that I aspirate ONLY when I eat or drink or in my wheelchair, but NOT when I eat or drink lying down. So basically, I’m the OPPOSITE of most humans. You should’ve seen the Doctors faces when they found out and even my own Doctor couldn’t explain it.

I’ve always known that I was a Medical enigma, this just cements my belief.

Nowadays, when I drink sitting up, I go very slow & take my time.

Besides all that crap, I got better just in time for Summer and I’ve been enjoying the hot, sunny weather. Right around the corner is Bluesfest which starts July 8th to the 19th. The big act that I’m looking forward to seeing at Bluesfest this year is KISS.

Among the others: Styx, LIVE, Ludacris, Busta Rhymes, Ice Cube, The Dead Weather, Ben Harper, Joe Cocker, Our Lady Peace, Stone Temple Pilots, Sam Roberts, Blue Rodeo, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, The Yardbirds, The Zombies, Neko Case, Holy Fuck, & MANY MANY more.

For more info, go to http://www.ottawabluesfest.ca/en/

This year, they’ve added free shows elsewhere.

I plan on seeing George Clinton & The P-Funk All Stars, The Proclaimers, & Arrested Development.

For more info on that, go to http://www.bluesfestbyward.com/

You may be wondering why I’m promoting it so much. Well, not only is it a great festival, but also because I helped with making it more wheelchair accessible and I’m proud to see my ideas come to life & hopefully help others like myself get to the different stages easier.

Speaking of music…

We all know by now that Michael Jackson passed away last Thursday. Part of me is still in shock, but not overly surprised. Let’s be honest, I wasn’t really expecting a happy ending to his life. Even Michael himself once told Lisa Marie Presley that he didn’t want to die the way Elvis did. Sadly, he did and now he’ll probably be remembered in the same way, even YEARS from now.

I still remember dressing up as Michael for Halloween when I was a kid, complete with one white glove. I had a Poster of him and the Thriller casette. I think I actually still have the tape somewhere.

Regardless of what you thought of him, you can’t deny his success and when Thriller came out, it was groundbreaking, not only for music videos, but for music in general. He was truly THE MAN when it came to music and I’ll always remember him for that.

In other news…

I discovered Twitter about a week ago. At first, I wasn’t really sure what to make of it, but it’s growing on me, much like a fungus. If any of you use Twitter, you can find me at ryanlythall.

Original name eh…

That’s it for now, but I’ll be back soon.

Thanks for reading everybody & please let me know that you read it.

I’m tired but here’s a rundown of my day.

8:30 am — Woke up

8:50 am — Bed store called to say they’ll be here between 12-3.

9:30 am — Coffee

10:30 am — Deconstruction of my old bed begins with help from the super.

11:15 am — Old bed is out of my place and in pieces.

11:30 am — New room design begins with moving tv and computer stands.

12:45 pm — Bed company arrives

1:00 pm — Bed’s installed

2:00 pm — Finished minor rearranging

2:15 pm — Break

2:50 pm — Called cable company to find out how to rehook digital tv box.

3:30 pm — Attempt at napping, but didn’t go well due to people calling. I LOVE the bed.

8:00 pm — My Wife called and said she got me a surprise at IKEA.

8:30 pm — Ending this post.

I headed to Walmart today. I have a love/hate thing for Walmart.

A new Super Walmart opened up so I checked it out. The ride itself took just over an hour, which was really annoying. By the time I got there, I wanted to return home.

The freakin place is HUGE and even has a Grocery Store in it.
I spent about two hours going up and down the aisles.

People can be pretty dumb when it comes to getting out of my way. I give people two options if they’re in my way, move, or be moved. Things can be interesting when you drive a 500+ pound powered wheelchair. I do my best not to hit people, but sometime it’s unavoidable. On the other hand, sometimes I WANT to run over people, but I hold back.

If you want to piss off Walmart Shoppers and have a blast at the same time, here’s a tip.

Go with a friend. Grab two of those Scooters that they have. Race around the Store in them and if anyone asks, just say you’re doing the Walmart Indy and the winner gets a new Wheelchair. This also works if you’re in a Wheelchair already. If any of you actually do this, I want Pictures or a Video of it.

When I was Single, I’d often go to Bars or Clubs and get hammered. Driving home was often challenging, but I never got hit or anything and never got pulled over. I’d be curious to see a Cop do a Breathalyzer test on me while I’m using a Ventilator 24/7 to breathe. Just imagine the Cop’s face when I told him that.

So as for Walmart.

I bought some Shirts for Summer, & Mrs Doubtfire on DVD. Next week is my 4th Anniversary for my Wife & I. I bought a few things for that, but I’m not gonna say what right now.

I’m really not liking the new WordPress Dashboard. For one thing, they removed the word count thing. This may sound odd, but I like knowing how many words I typed in a post. I can’t really explain why, I just do. I’m sure there’s more things about it that I’ll uncover as time goes on. They should at least give people the option to use “Classic” Dashboard as well.

This is what happens when you give Nerds Red Bull.

So the Ottawa Senators loss last night, but managed to make it to the Playoffs. They pulled a Homer. Let’s see how well they do.

Well, that’s all for now.