Archive for August, 2009

As you all know, my Wife and I went to Montreal for the day yesterday.

We left Ottawa by Train at 10 AM and arrived in Montreal around Noon. Going to Montreal is a breeze compared to all the travelling I did last year when I played Boccia.

When we arrived, I got a Coffee and then waited for our Cab. The Wheelchair Accessible Cabs in Montreal are pretty good, just for the fact that Wheelchairs are able to sit beside the Driver.

Here in Ottawa, we sit sideways behind the Driver, or in the very back, or behind him, but further back. Apparently, we’re no better than a Bike or oversized Luggage.

Our destination was The Biodome, which is about 20 or 30 minutes from the Train Station. I got to see another area of Montreal, which I really enjoyed.

When we arrived, I was amazed at the size of The Olympic Stadium and the Biodome. Right after we got off, we headed to The Olympic Stadium to take the Elevator to the Observation Deck.

Personally, I thought it was almost better than The CN Tower. I say that because from my point of view, the view’s not that good, just because the bars are too high for me to see as good as others. The Olympic Stadium’s better for me because of that.

From there, we headed next door to The Biodome. I’ve been wanting to go there for awhile now. I was pretty stoked to be there.

Our first stop inside was the Jungle. I was in there for a few minutes, when a Common Trumpeter (Bird) casually walked up to me. He started checking me and my Wheelchair out. For a few moments, he looked like he wanted to jump up, but no, he walked away afterwards. He was really cute.

From there, I saw Parrots, Monkeys, an Alligator, different Birds, Puffins, Penguins, Fishes, a Gecko, a Chameleon, and even watched him eat a Worm. From there, we saw Lemurs as well.

I LOVE animals, so this was pretty fun for me. It sure beats feeding Horses and Goats. No offense, but Chameleons, Geckos, and Birds are alot more cooler to look at, especially if you can interact with them.

We tried to get to The Insectarium, but it was hard to get to, plus we were short on time. We hung out for awhile in The Botanical Garden. It was pretty, but not really my thing.

By this time, it was time to return to The Train Station to catch the Train back to Ottawa. One of the Elevators wasn’t working well while I was on it. Luckily, it was able to go up, so I could get off.

We managed to get on the Train in time before it left. On our way back, we relaxed with free Wine and Chocolate. It’s a hard life in First Class, what can I say?

We got back to Ottawa just after 8 PM and were home by 9.
After we looked at the pics and emailed some, my Wife went home to sleep.
After getting up at 6:30 AM, I slept like a baby.

I’m a big fan of Montreal. I think it’s a beautiful City, and I love the designs of some of the Buildings. There also seems to be a crapload of things to do.

For example, there was a NASCAR Event held there yesterday, a Film Festival was going on, and while I was at The Biodome, a Major League Soccer game was going on. We only had one big Event here in Ottawa yesterday. That was The Gay Pride Parade. I heard it was pretty fun. I hope to one day attend the one in Toronto.

Ottawa’s a very dull, uptight City.

There’s at least two things wrong with Montreal though, at least to me.

1. It’s not very Wheelchair Accessible, especially the Subway and Old Montreal.
2. If you don’t speak French, you’re screwed. I found that out about 10 years ago.

Long story short, my Map flew away. I tried to ask for directions, but it took awhile because everyone I asked were French.

As for today, I headed to the Bank to pay a Bill.
The rest of my night will be spent doing Laundry.

Back to reality.

Thanks for reading.


I had a blast in Montreal.
I’ll write all about it on Monday.

This is my 200th post.

So, I stayed over at my Wife’s last night.
We both slept pretty well.

It’s raining today, so I’m just relaxing before our big trip tomorrow.
The only bad part is that I’ll be waking up around 6:30 or 7 AM, but at least it’s for a fun reason.

So, I woke up this Morning and my Wife showed me the Newspaper. The Ottawa Citizen had somehow managed to post Articles about H1N1 in almost EVERY freakin’ section of Saturday’s Paper.
I was expecting to read that Jon got the H1N1 Flu from one of Odie’s wet kisses.

But seriously, I just wanna say one thing though.
Shut the fuck up!

In this day in age, with the Internet, TV News, Radio etc, there’s no need to smother Newspaper readers with News of H1N1. We get it, thank you. No need to mentally & visually rape us

Let me summarize all the reports, as a kind gesture to my fellow readers.

1. There’s a CHANCE that the H1N1 Flu will hit at SOME point during the upcoming Flu season.
Good news though, there’s a Vaccine for it. We just don’t know what the fuck it’s gonna do to you, and we’re not sure who to give it to.

2. No cause for alarm though, people are standing by, to direct you elsewhere in the hopes you get better, or at least not sue them or die.

3. As far as prevention goes, just wash your hands, avoid contact with sick people. If need be, go to work or the Hospital wearing a Mask. Better yet, just wander down a dark isolated Street with a Mask. You’ll be fine.

Long story short, I don’t care what kind of Medical background these so called “Experts” have, fact is, you know SHIT about what’s gonna happen. You’re better off trying to bring Nostradamus back to life and seeing what he has to say about it.

Bottom line is, it’s my personal belief that it’s been extremely blown out of proportion. Sure, a few people might get sick and/or die from the Flu. It happens every single year. The only difference this year is that the Media, and the World Health Organization (WHO) are putting a different spin on it. It’s gonna create mass fear (more than now) and that’ll cause more problems than the actual illness itself.

So, just relax. If you get the Flu, DON’T panic. Just do what you normally do to get better.

Whatever you do, don’t refer to it as Swine Flu.
It gives Pigs a bad name or something.

Stay healthy!

This has been a Ryan Rant.

Thanks for reading.

I didn’t really do much last night.
I was kinda in the dog house, but everything seems ok now.
Even Crips mess up. The only difference is that we can’t backtrack, mostly because Elevators tend not to go backwards.

Yeah…think about that…

Anyways, today, I went out to get a free Coffee with a Coupon cause I’m just that rich.
After I returned home, I went to see my Wife to get a few things to continue my plan of World Domination.

On Sunday, we’re heading to France Light aka Montreal.
We’re gonna spend the Afternoon at the Biodome.
The Biodome houses different animals from around the World.
I’m hoping to see at least one Monkey in a Diaper, just for amusement purposes.
I’m sure I’ll see a bunch of Frogs in Montreal too.

*coughs innocently*


Well that’s it for now.

Have a good weekend.

Au revoir!

We had a great time last night at The Merlot Rooftop Grill last night. We stayed long enough to take two spins in the revolving Restaurant.

We had Wine, she had Salad, we had Creme Brulee, and Coffee.
I drank most of the Wine actually.

I have two beefs about the place though.

1. The fact that you gotta take the Elevator to the floor below it, then climb upstairs to get a key so you can take the Elevator up one floor to the Restaurant. I had people with me, but what happens if you’re wheelin solo? You’re fucked until someone comes down the stairs.

2. Way too much AC! When’s the temperature’s going down to six degrees, you don’t need air conditioning. When I went to the movie the other day, the AC was broken and people were ACTUALLY happy about it, including me.

After Dinner, we headed home together.

I forgot to record America’s Got Talent, but I found the results.
Drew Stevyns, The Eriam Sisters, Recycled Percussion, Barbara Padilla and Erik and Rickie all advanced to the next round.

I’m not happy about Drew Stevyns, and the Recycled Percussions won. So much for originality I guess.

At least three of my picks moved on.
The next show will be Tuesday night.

Well that’s it for now.

Thanks for reading

Today, is my Third Anniversary of when I proposed to my Wife.
As promised, here’s the story of how it happened. The story’s one of my favorites, and it even includes an International Political Figure who’s actually in the news today.

It all started a few weeks before our trip to Toronto. I was on an OC Transpo bus heading to Walmart to get a few things. I knew I had a big trip coming up and I wanted to get her something special.

My Attended reminded me that they sold Engagement Rings at Walmart. At first, I was skeptical of buying it at Walmart. It just didn’t seem like something that I’d buy at Walmart.

I walked in and headed to the Counter to look at Rings. After about 15 or 20 minutes, I found the one that I wanted and thought that would look good on her finger. All I had to do was figure out how to propose to her.

The next few weeks were rough on me. I wrote, and rewrote the proposal. I’m not the type of guy that follows a script. When I did Comedy, I would often improvise on the spot during my set. Needless to say, this wasn’t an easy task.

As weeks turned into days before our trip, I was getting more and more nervous every day. Soon it was time to go to the Train Station.

We arrived at the Ottawa Train Station, not knowing who was going to be in First Class with us.

While we were waiting in the Train Station’s VIP Lounge, we saw Luba Goy. Luba Goy is a Lengendary Canadian Comedian, most notable from the Royal Canadian Air Farce. Sadly, I remembered her most from being on Mr. Dressup and other kids shows.

For most of the ride, she sat elsewhere in our section. At one point, she walked by us to use the bathroom. On her way back, I yelled out, hey, I know you. From there, she introduced herself and she asked to join us. I must admit that I was a little starstrucked, just because she’s a Comedy Legend. At the time, I was just a few days away from my first Comedy gig ever. This was a pretty big deal to me.

She stayed with us for the rest of the trip, which was about two hours at this point. She was a great lady, very interested in us and our story etc. She even called me a few days later and literally left a 5 minute message on my voicemail. I was sad that I missed her call. I tried to contact her, but had no luck.

As if that wasn’t odd enough, there was someone else sitting near us, who’s pretty well known too. As it turned out, The President Of Afghanistan, Hamid Karzai was sitting beside us surrounded by Bodyguards.

At first, I didn’t believe it, but Luba Goy, and my Wife confirmed it. I googled him when we returned home, sure enough, it was him. He made small talk with us for a few minutes, which was pretty neat.

Our Train arrived, and my Wife & I headed to our Hotel right across the Street. We managed to get a Suite at the Fairmont Royal York. The room was HUGE, and I could actually use the bathroom. I can’t even do that in my home.

The moment was soon to arrive. I decided that I wanted to be comfortable, so I proposed to her just wearing Boxers. She was wearing something comfty and sexy as well.

All I truly remember from the Proposal is saying that I want to tell her something. Apparently, I freaked her out because she thought I was mad at her or something. That’s not a good way to begin a Proposal.
As it turned out, she said yes, and I later found out that she was hoping that I’d ask.

We went to bed after that. Believe it or not, this was the first time we were able to sleep together. The reason is because I was still using a Hospital Bed at the time, and it was just a single bed. In fact, whenever she stayed over, she’d have to sleep on the floor. Needless to say, we didn’t really sleep that night in Toronto.

The next morning, we ordered room service. I managed to frighten the guy with an overly friendly hello from my bed, which was about 40 or 50 feet from the door. Hey, I got engaged, and spent the night having great sex. I think you’d be pretty happy too.

My Wife & I spent a few hours sightseeing in Toronto and went up The CN Tower, which was my second time there at that point. I went back one time since, which was just last Summer.

A few hours later, we headed back to Ottawa. There wasn’t anyone famous on our journey back, but we had a train load of memories.

Tonight we’re heading to a revolving Roof Top Restaurant to celebrate.

It’s not as high as The CN Tower, but it’s not easy to when you’re still on top of the world, three years later.

So, last night was full of performances on America’s Got Talent.
Here’s a list of who performed:

Ishaara (Bollywood Dance Group)
Barbara Padilla (Opera Singer)
Pam Martin’s Top Dogs (Dog Variety Act)
African High Flyers (Acrobats)
Mia Boostrom (Singer/Musician)
Erik and Rickie (Ballroom Dancers)
Coney Island Chris (Sideshow)
Matt & Anthony (Dance/Musician Duo)
The Lollipop Girls (Burlesque Dance Troupe)
Drew Stevyns (Singer/Guitarist)
Recycled Percussion Band (Band)
The EriAm Sisters (Singing Group)

I didn’t get a chance to vote before the deadline, but the first two acts (Ishaara, & Barbara Padilla) were pretty good.

Ishaara knows their Bollywood stuff and they did a great job. Barbara Padilla also turned in a great performance. Opera isn’t my thing, but I like people with true talent in Music.

Pam Martin’s Top Dogs were alright, but Dog Acts tend to bore me after awhile.
African High Flyers weren’t bad, but their Audition was better.

Mia Boostrom tried out last year, but didn’t make it. This time around, she did a Leonard Cohen song that suited her. It was a pretty strong performance.
Erik and Rickie were very good. They’re only 8 and 9 years old, but danced like Adults who’ve done it their whole life. I was VERY impressed by them.

The Lollipop Girls were sexy and danced well, plus gave a show suited for Las Vegas. On the other hand, Coney Island Chris absolutely bombed. He lit his Tongue on fire, and blew flames. We’ve all seen that.

I’m not really sure what Matt & Anthony are trying to do. One sings with a Guitar while the other is tap dancing. Odd combo.
Drew Stevyns has an ok voice, but far from being the best Singer on the show. He also looks like just another douche bag with a Guitar.

Recycled Percussion Band has been done to death already. They’re like the Blue Man Group minus the make-up.
The EriAm Sisters were very good at doing a Destiny’s Child song.

Out of the ones that performed last night, here’s my choices for the ones to move on:
Barbara Padilla
Mia Boostrom
Erik and Rickie
The Lollipop Girls
The EriAm Sisters

We’ll find out tonight who moves on to the next round.

Thanks for reading.

Last night, I headed to a nearby Restaurant to check out the accessibility.
It didn’t start off too well.

The Restaurant is on the top floor of a Hotel.
You gotta take the Elevator all the way up to the floor below it, have someone walk upstairs, get a key or grab someone with a key, come back downstairs to bring me upstairs.

It’s a retarded setup, but my Wife and I are going there to celebrate tomorrow night.
This could be interesting, but hopefully everything will go well.

As promised, tomorrow, I will be sharing the story of how I proposed to my Wife three years ago in Toronto.

After the Restaurant thing, I headed to the Grocery Store to help out my Wife.
To my surprise, she had just finished her Shopping, so we walked home together.
I spent some time at her place before heading home to watch WWE Monday Night Raw.

America’s Got Talent is on tonight. I’m not gonna predict who’s performing tonight, but I’m looking forward to it.

I’ll be back tomorrow with a full recap, my marriage proposal story, and perhaps a few other things as well.

Thanks for reading.