So last night, I spent the evening with my Wife. We hung out & watched America’s Got Talent. We were hoping to see performances in the second round, but there weren’t any. At least we got to hang out though.

In other news, my Wife & I are trying to plan a day trip to Montreal. So far, the phone lines & website are jammed due to VIA Rail’s 60% sale offer. Last weekend, they went on Strike and this is their way of apologizing for it. The offer was extended until this Friday, so hopefully we can pull it off.

I’m heading to Walmart tomorrow afternoon, because frankly, my life just isn’t funny enough. I have to pick up some household items, and I’m cheap. The answer to that equation is to go to Walmart.

Tomorrow night, my Wife & I are heading out to the Busker Festival on the Sparks Street Mall. I usually have a pretty good time, if I get a good view. I usually try to find Performers who are setting up & I quickly nab a spot in the front. I keep hoping one of them will pick me from the crowd to help them, or at least be part of their show. If any of the Performers are reading this, I have a really big powered wheelchair & I can possibly be used to jump over, or hell, just bang on my table. I’m also a pretty fun guy & know how to get the crowd going. I can do stuff, trust me. I used to be a Stand-Up Comedian.

Use me!

It’s a pretty rainy day here in Ottawa, so it’s time for another childhood memory from when I was living in the Hospital.

Today, I’m gonna talk about the second time that I broke my leg.

I was on my way back to the Hospital after spending the day at the Jack Purchell Community Centre. We were just about to cross the Pretoria Bridge by the Rideau Canal. A Car cut us off, and the Driver had to slam on the brakes.

The Seat of my wheelchair fell forward. I hit the Driver on the back of his head with my face & then I crashed to the floor face first. The Woman that was with me started freaking out and screaming. The Ventilator Tube had come off, so I wasn’t breathing during the ordeal. Luckily, the Woman quickly realized and grabbed the Ambu Bag.

An Ambu-Bag is something that goes on my neck to help me breathe. Everytime someone squeezes it, it fills my lungs with air. Part of my Disability affect my lungs and I can’t breathe on my own. So yadda, yadda, yadda, the Ambu-Bag saved my life.

I laid there on the floor until the Ambulance came. I was moaning in pain. One of the Paramedics asked the Woman if I always moaned or made odd sounds. I managed to yell, No! I’m in pain, damnit! He felt stupid for asking.

As they carried me out on the Stretcher, I asked someone if I was going to be on the TV news. Even as a kid, I was a Media Whore.

So I arrived “home” in an Ambulance, and got wheeled into the ER. The funniest thing about all of this was that the Nurses had no idea who I was. Even though, I had been living there for at least ten or eleven years at this point. They kept asking me where I lived & I kept saying, upstairs, I live upstairs!. I think they believed that I hit my head just a little too hard.

Eventually, they called upstairs and the Nurse vouched for me. I broke both of my legs, and my nose. The Bus Company paid me $3000 and I had a wonderful trip to Toronto.

Thanks for reading.

Advertisements
Comments
  1. Pascal Dubuc says:

    HolyShit! Ryan that`s an incredibly fucked up story. How old were you? I guess our outings have been mostly tame compared to that.

  2. bob says:

    I got to read your story cause I did a Google search for ambu bag in Ottawa. Need one for our office. Peace dood.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s